Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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