and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i permit you to call me
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
