ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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