I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
