This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
