The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
