I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
