I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Still dying that you shit outside
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize