I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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