i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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