should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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