I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize