Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
