so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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