it wasn't lemon gatorade
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
