Where is the hickey?
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
