just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
COCAINE IS GR8
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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