I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Randomize
