Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
wow bdsm is so cute
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