I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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