okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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