Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
