I've blown a few things in my day
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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