Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
