Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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