All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
do herpes really smell.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize