id be glad to
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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