# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Dignity is for republicans.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I'm having to shit out rocks
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
