Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
