I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
You have to summon your inner elephant
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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