Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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