Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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