Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
