David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
