Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize