He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
