Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
