We're like a lot better than the average bears
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
