had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
we made out on top of his cat.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
