So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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