My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
