i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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