You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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