I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
