I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
