all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
