What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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