dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
