this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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