You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize