As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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